Do you ever feel overwhelmed by all the self-care advice out there? If so, you’re not alone. Self-care isn’t about trying to do everything perfectly—it’s about finding small ways to support your well-being without feeling guilty or pressured.
In this article, I’ll guide you through creating a personalized self-care plan that fits your life. Let’s take it step by step so you can focus on what matters most for you.
Quick Takes
- Start with one or two habits that feel most important to your current well-being.
- Listen to your needs and prioritize self-care practices that help you feel more balanced.
- Adjust your plan when necessary and be kind to yourself if things don’t go perfectly.
Why Does Self-Care Feel So Overwhelming?
There’s no shortage of advice on how to practice self-care—eat right, sleep enough, exercise, meditate, and the list goes on. When life is already hectic, trying to follow all these tips can feel impossible.
But self-care doesn’t have to be a long checklist of tasks. It’s about making small, intentional choices that improve how you feel, one day at a time.
Working to make self-care fit your life
Step 1: Recognize the Overwhelm
First, take a moment to accept that feeling overwhelmed by self-care is normal. You’re not alone in feeling this way, and it doesn’t mean you’re failing. Self-care is personal, and it should support your well-being, not add stress to your life. For example, if the only self-care you can add to your life right now is to commit to eating better meals, that is wonderful, and much better than just ignoring your self care altogether.
Step 2: Focus on What You Need Most Right Now
To start, think about what’s causing you the most discomfort or stress. Is it physical exhaustion? Emotional burnout? Maybe you’ve been neglecting your social life or mental well-being. What area of your life would benefit the most from care?
Take a moment to reflect:
- Am I getting enough rest?
- Do I feel connected to the people I care about?
- How is my body feeling—tense, tired, or restless?
Pick one or two areas to focus on for now. These will be your priority.
Examples: If you’re always exhausted, start by focusing on sleep. If socializing feels draining, your priority might be setting boundaries around social interactions. If your body feels uncomfortable, it makes sense to figure out why, and then address that with self-care.
Step 3: Start Small, One Step at a Time
You don’t have to overhaul your entire routine overnight. In fact, small changes often lead to bigger results over time.
Choose one simple habit that feels achievable right now. It could be:
- Drinking an extra glass of water each day
- Getting 10 minutes of sunlight in the morning
- Taking three deep breaths when you feel stressed
The key is to start small. These habits should feel manageable, not overwhelming.
Real-World Example: One of my friends felt overwhelmed with self-care routines she started and quit multiple times. Then she started again with just one habit—taking a 5-minute walk after lunch each day, to address tension in her legs and back. That small change gave her more energy and comfort in her body. Then, over time, she added more habits like stretching and journaling.
Step 4: Give Yourself Permission to Pause
Self-care is not about perfection. Some days, you might not be able to follow through with your plans—and that’s okay. Life is unpredictable, and your self-care plan should be flexible enough to adapt to changes.
If things get overwhelming, give yourself permission to pause. Maybe that means skipping a workout or taking a break from social media for a few days. Self-care isn’t about doing it all—it’s about doing what you can, when you can.
A list of the self-care activities you want to do in your life right now helps you stay on track when you do need to pause. You can always refer back to your list and decide when to continue activities you’ve let rest a bit.
Step 5: Create Your Personalized Self-Care Plan
Let’s break self-care down into key areas to help you focus on what matters most. Choose one or two areas to start with, and you can add more habits over time as you feel ready.
| Self-Care Area | What to Consider | Simple Habit to Try |
|---|---|---|
| Physical Health | Are you sleeping enough? Are you feeling tired or sluggish during the day? | Set a consistent bedtime and aim for 7-8 hours of sleep. |
| Do you get regular movement, or are you feeling stiff and restless? | Do 10 minutes of stretching or walking each day. | |
| Emotional Well-Being | Do you feel emotionally drained—like your energy is depleted, or you feel numb or disconnected from your feelings? | Spend 5 minutes each day practicing deep breathing or mindfulness meditation. |
| Are you holding onto unresolved emotions, like feeling weighed down by past experiences or unsettled conflicts? | Try journaling about your feelings for 10 minutes each night. | |
| Mental Clarity | Do you struggle to focus or feel mentally cluttered, like your mind is racing with too many thoughts? | Try doing a brain dump each morning—write down all your thoughts to clear your mind. |
| Is your mind racing before bed, preventing restful sleep? | Establish a pre-bedtime wind-down routine without screens for 30 minutes before sleep. | |
| Social Connections | Are you feeling isolated or disconnected from others? | Reach out to a friend or family member for a short, meaningful conversation at least once a week. |
| Do social interactions feel draining, making it hard to enjoy being with others? | Set healthy boundaries by saying “no” to one non-essential event or commitment this week. | |
| Spiritual Balance | Do you feel lost or aimless, as if you’re disconnected from your sense of purpose or lacking direction in life? | Take 10 minutes each day to practice gratitude or reflect on what gives your life meaning. |
| Do you want to connect more deeply with your spiritual or religious practices? | Set aside one morning or evening each week for spiritual reading, prayer, or quiet reflection. | |
| Nutrition | Do you often feel low on energy, lightheaded, or sluggish—signs that you might not be eating enough nutritious food? | Add one extra serving of vegetables or fruit to your meals each day. |
| Do you feel thirsty, have a dry mouth, or experience fatigue throughout the day? These could be signs of dehydration. | Keep a water bottle nearby and aim to drink 8 cups of water daily. | |
| Stress Management | Do you often feel tense, on edge, or like you’re constantly under pressure? | Take a 5-minute break to stretch, breathe deeply, or step outside for fresh air. |
| Are you struggling with work-life balance and finding it hard to unwind? | Set a daily time limit for checking work emails or phone notifications after work hours. | |
| Financial Wellness | Are you feeling stressed about finances or unprepared for emergencies? | Create a simple budget and start tracking your expenses for one week to gain clarity. |
| Are you neglecting long-term financial goals like saving or investing? | Set up an automatic transfer to savings each month, even if it’s a small amount. | |
| Personal Growth | Do you feel stagnant or unmotivated, like you’re not progressing in the areas that matter most to you? | Set one small, achievable goal for the month, like reading 10 pages of a self-improvement book. |
| Are you unsure about where to focus your energy for growth? | Take 15 minutes to reflect on your values and how they align with your current lifestyle. | |
| Creative Expression | Do you feel stifled creatively, like you haven’t had time or space to express yourself through art, writing, or music? | Dedicate 10 minutes a day to a creative hobby, whether it’s drawing, writing, or music. |
| Do you feel like you never have time for your creative pursuits? | Schedule a creative activity into your week, just like you would a meeting or appointment. | |
| Environmental Well-Being | Does your living space feel cluttered or chaotic, contributing to stress? | Set a timer for 10 minutes and declutter one area of your home or workspace each day. |
| Are you longing for a more calming, peaceful home environment? | Add one element of nature to your space—like a plant or natural light—to create a calming vibe. |
You don’t need to tackle all these areas at once. Pick the one or two that feel most important, and start with just one small habit. As time goes on, you can add more when you’re ready.
More stuff from other places about making self care work for you
- Why Does Self-Care Sometimes Feel So Hard? A lot of self-care resources I’ve used in the past make it sound like we were “born ready” to indulge in self-care. That’s not true. Self-care can be hard.
- Self-care may be increasing your stress. A thoughtful article that suggests sometimes what we need might be the opposite of what self-care preaches.
Conclusion: Self-Care is About Progress, Not Perfection
Remember, self-care isn’t about doing it all or doing it perfectly. It’s about finding what works for you and making small, meaningful changes to support your well-being. Be kind to yourself along the way, and give yourself credit for every step you take—even the smallest ones.
You are already doing something great by considering what’s best for you. Now, it’s time to take the next step.
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